Don't you just hate pants?

I stole that phrase from a friend of mine (who stole it from the Simpsons...thanks Cris) because I like it and I think it's funny. But, really, who likes pants? They're restrictive, they get in the way when you least want them to, often you can trip over them. Really, what good are pants?

I, for one, think we should boycott pants. People should get over their worries about walking around with no pants on. If no one was wearing pants, would showing the world your underwear really be that strange?

Also, I think this would be a boon to the underwear manufacturers of the world. There would be a huge increase in the sale of designer underwear; because if that's what you're showing people...why wear tighty-whiteys, right?

The only problem that I see is weather. I live in the Northeast and it can get damn cold up here. The idea of heading outside on a 20 degree morning with nothing between the cold winter air and my pasty white legs is not one that I relish. I've not quite figured out a way around this problem yet...short of never leaving the house during the winter; which isn't really in the cards. Maybe we'd have to build a vast, heated, underground transit system to get around with during the cold months or something. I'll have to think on that.

Alas, until people get over their predjudices against not wearing pants (and we solve issues like the cold weather thing), it would seem that we're stuck with pants...in public at least. But I say, when you're home, lose the pants!

You want to take my what???

So now, apparently, bacon causes cancer. Health experts in the UK have gone so far as to say that we should eliminate it from our diet as humans.

EXCUSE ME??? ELIMINATE BACON??? FUCK YOU!!!

The day I stop eating bacon is the day I take my leave of this green Earth. It will not happen. Bacon is just too tasty. Sure, I know, bacon isn't so good for you. Fat and whatnot. So don't eat pounds and pounds of it. But to suggest that we ban it? That's just crazy talk. What's next? Chocolate causes the gout? Ice cream is linked to rabies? Where does it end?

For me...it ends with bacon. I'm done with "scientists" telling me that I shouldn't eat this or I shouldn't eat that. They never know for sure. Things like this change all the time. Milk used to be good, then it was bad, now it's good again. Same thing with eggs.

The way I see it is this: everything in moderation. I'm not going to stop eating anything because some scientist tells me to. I just don't eat or drink too much of any one thing is all. Bacon for breakfast once a week is not going to kill me. Neither is a six pack of beer a night...OK, that might some day, but you know what? It makes me happy so damn you for judging me.

Stop eating bacon...now that's just nuts.

The NFL is full of whiners

OK, now I'm getting irate. I could handle the SpyGate talk, Belichick deserved that. I could handle the "Patriots haven't played anyone good" talk. I had thought that I would be able to handle the "Patriots are running up the score talk and are all poor sports" talk; but then it took a turn for the worse yesterday.

Bill Cowher basically came out and said that if the Patriots continue to crush their opponents like they have been doing, then someone is going to take a cheap-shot at Tom Brady to try to injure him. This is fucking ridiculous. Ultimately, what Cowher is saying is that you're only allowed to be so good. You can only get to a certain level, and then you have to stop because you're hurting peoples' feelings and they're going to get you back for it.

I had thought that this was a league of professionals. I had thought this was a league of men. I had thought wrong.

The Patriots are just that good, it's that simple. Why should they be forced to dial it down to pander to the rest of a mediocre league? If teams cannot stop what the Patriots can do, then so be it.

I haven't even mentioned the fact that the Pats have a chance to do something historic this year. Tom Brady has a chance to destroy records this year. But the entire league is pissing and moaning that essentially, because no one has been able to keep them from doing it, they shouldn't be allowed to. Tom Brady should stop throwing five touchdowns a game because he's making other teams feel bad? Ridiculous.

You can be the best...just don't be too good, or someone might start crying.

Just depressing...

The newly proposed legislation regarding increase jail sentences not only for copyright infringement, but for intent to infringe copyrights. That can get you up to 10 years if this passes. Ten years. Are you kidding me? There are many violent crimes that will get you far less jail time than that.

Just another sign that our government is owned by special interests. Laws are no longer written; they are bought. Period.

Traveling man

Well, here I sit in my hotel room in illustrious Sunbury...no, Selinsgrove, PA. I've traveled for the job before, but never on short notice. It's a bit interesting being somewhat outside my comfort zone. Ah well...we adapt, do we not?

The flight down was uneventful, which is how I like them. We'll see what tomorrow brings, though.

Off to dinner.

Not looking to alarm anyone or anything, but...

Shit is fucked up right now. Venezuela is, as we speak, being systematically converted to a totalitarian dictatorship under the guise of socialism. Soldiers and civilians are dying daily in Iraq. Iran is giving the entire world the middle finger. Oh, and the economies of the two superpowers of the world (China and the US) are suddenly on the verge of collapse.

Now, if that sounds a bit doomsday, well, tough I guess because it's basically true. The world is crazy right now. Of course, this is not the first time, nor will it be the last time, that the world has been seemingly off it's rocker. It just seems, at least to many in my generation, that things have gotten really bad. You have to remember, that I was born, just after the Vietnam war ended. I grew up watching the US get stronger and our biggest enemy at the time, the USSR, get weaker and eventually completely collapse. The first "war" that I witnessed was Desert Storm. I'd seen harder fought football games for cripes' sake.

This, though...this is different. When it was just the US and the USSR at odds, things seemed simple. There was a clear enemy. Sure, there was the threat of a horrific nuclear holocaust erupting at any time, but there was always a certain sense that it would never happen. Why? Because you knew that deep down, just like us, the Soviets wanted to live. Not so now. We are fighting against people that hate us and our way of life passionately and not only are they not afraid of dying...they look forward to it! Virgins await them in heaven. I don't know about you, but I think that is some scary shit. How do you win against someone that has nothing to lose. How do you reason with a man who's one goal in life is to blow himself up and take a few Americans with him?

I wish I had answers. What I can say is that I don't feel like we've reacted particularly well to the situation. We (by we I mean our government) used 9/11 to go on the offensive. We'd been hit, hard, and God-dammit if we weren't going to knock someone the fuck out. Saddam Hussein happened to fall in the crosshairs. Was he a bad guy? Absolutely. Did he deserve to be punished for what he did to his people? Definitely. Did we have any reason to invade his country after 9/11? Not so far as I can tell.

But invade we did. And there we remain. Fighting an enemy that may very well be shooting at our soldiers with weapons we sold them in the 80's. Ironic how that works out sometimes. I have nothing but respect for the people who serve in the Armed Forces. Hell, I tried to join the Air Force in my youth. (Who knew that eczema is a disqualifying condition?) I just feel like they're being forced to fight and die for the wrong reasons.

Of course, we can't just walk away now. We're in too deep. If we left Iraq now, the already shaky governmental structure would collapse entirely and a new Saddam would step in in short order. Either that, or Iran would waltz in and take over the place. It's become a lose-lose situation. Damned if we leave, damned if we stay...either way, I'm not going to feel any safer.